Before Sunrise & Before Sunset

Watched both the movies for the nth time. Just as the sunrise and sunset dawnson you, at the end of the night or the day, the movie ends with an amalgamationof feelings that dawns on you slowly, leaving you still and hanging in vaccum.Profound Impact. Everytime.

The chemistry,the conversations and characters leave you enchanted. You suddenly feel aliveand breathing more consciously. 

It flows simply, beautifully, naturally and effortlessly with no frills. Thelistening box scene, the phone conversation, conversation in the car, the sceneon the bench. Each expression, verbal and non-verbal is so very detailed.Poignant. Latent deep and large feelings. Jesse and Celine, They share, wish,yearn, desire, burn and hope.

The indirectness that is there is mature and beautiful. There is no story yetthere is something weaving in the background without it being pushed to you.There is no story in the sequel as well. All that there is for the story is the10 years between the movies and the exact time frame when Jesse and Celine meetagain in Paris, having met in Vienna earlier.

Mesmerising'ly yours
Faded Glory

Hooked & Booked

So Mr M, my closest guy friend of 8yrs is officially getting hitched. Hooked and booked for life.Overwhelmed, Happy, Apprehensive, Sad, Excited all at the same time. There have been so many ups and downs through which he has been around, though the advice was never paid heed to. Without any second thoughts, Id call up to share the happiest news, the saddest incident, the silliest gossip anytime like a 24 hour helpline. Now all that impulsiveness ought to stop.

Befriending someone has never been so difficult so far. So, Mrs M, S would soon be my friend too (atleast hoping). Cant wait to team up with her to share the nasty little secrets about M that would do the tricks.

But he is getting married and things will never be the same for us and I have tuned into the music already. The fear is about feeling less important or out of place when I meet him next. The fear is whether she would accept us the way we are. Now, its the time to step back and accept the big change in all of our lives.

Top it all: His wedding date is my birth date. Could it have been any better :)

And to you M: Is baar ka gift maaf kia considering ab tumhare kharche badhne waale hain :P MBBS ki degree milne wali hai :P

Love Actually

You must fall in love many times. Once, you must fall in love with your best friend, ruining your friendship forever. This will teach you who your true friends are, and how confusing friendships can be and love even more complicated. Once you must fall in love with someone you believe is perfect. You will learn that no one is perfect, and that you should never accept anything less than you deserve. And once, you must fall in love with someone who is exactly like you. This will teach you about who you are, and who you want to be.
And when you’re through with all of that, you learn that the people who care about you the most are the ones that you hurt, and the ones that hurt you are the ones that needed you the most.

Lovingly yours
Faded Glory

How do you feel tonight?

A post from a friends Facebook page:
The UN says the world's populations hits 7 billion today. It's amazing how it's still so hard to meet anyone worth dating.

Wondering why its so hard, when there are billions of people who are the kinds that would pass on your checklist. Yes, there are many who seemingly would fit your bill. We want them to be a certain way and they are. They are well educated, earn well, look good. Externally everything matches. BUT!

I guess the most important thing missing is how we feel, well atleast for me. You dont need him/her 'to be' anything. Internally, one needs to feel a certain way with a person. That feeling is enough and will be enough for me to be happy. Everything else gets masked.

Happily yours
Faded Glory

The X Factor

The simplest reaons why the 'EX' is called an 'EX' is coz its an 'EX'ample of who you should not be with in any way and 'EX' as in she/he having an 'EX'it from your life. If its a thing of the past - past is where it should stay!

But then as life shall have it - its never as simple! All people are left with as a result of mixing up the past with the present is complications to deal with.

A walk to remember

Its just not a bloody movie! Its a movie that made me cry! Had my own little 'A Walk to Remember. 3 hours. On Foot. From Dhaula Kuan to Home.

With tired feet, a dead brain, cold hands, heavy shoulders and a small little heart that has little hope for myself, I said to myself a million times over - I will never be understood and accepted.

Wait Watching

We play a endless waiting game – life and me. Life waits for me to turn into the person it wills for me to be. I wait for it to turn into what I expect out of it. Some days life wins. Some days I win.

And in all the days that lie in between, there’s just the endless waiting.

Sigh-ingly yours
Faded Glory

Building Bridges

There are journeys to places, cities, countries. Then there are journeys of a different kind that involve people. They say sometimes the greatest journey is covering the distance between two people. Thats a timeless and a limitless journey. A neverending trail to set foot on. Strangers become aquaintances. Aquantainces become friends. Friends may become foes. Strangers and friends may become partners. Partners may become estranged. Transformation and Metamorphosis -All on the journey!!

At times, it takes a lifetime to really know people, and even after an eternity you still dont understand them even when they communicate through words. Sometimes, if you are lucky enough, the opposite happens, ie you finding people who understand even the unsaid from the look in the eye. Its a tightrope walk between being yourself and projecting a certain image, letting yourself loose and holding yourself back, percieving and judging others. The beauty is that the person on the otherside is just like you, walking a tightrope too, on the same journey to knowing you. You need to bare it for others to see you and for you to see them. Complexities galore.

Despite all the fallouts from it, being quite friendly and open to people, I have felt, it can take a minutely small insignificant gesture to bridge the gap between two people. A bright smile. A routine sms. A human touch. A tight hug. A funny joke. A warm kiss. A friendly hello. A catchup phone call. A small email. Thats all it may take. Isnt undertaking this journey of knowing people great for what its worth.

And as Joey would say it - How you doin ;)

Break Even

How many times is it possible to get your heart broken?
And
How many times by the same person ?

Will cry and brood over it and come back with answers if i get any ;)

Its Complicated

Facebook is smart. Really Smart. It has the option of relationship status as 'Its complicated' for people like me. But arent all relationships complicated.

Just that some are very complicated.

There is endless talking. There is sharing. There is care. There is a physical element in some way. There is fun. There is flirtatiousness. There is possessiveness. There is lust. There is liking. There is a connect. There is bonding. There is conflict. There is fun. There is a clash of opinions. There is support. There is a disagreement. There is happiness. There is fighting too. There is sweet nothing talk. There is getting hurt too. There is a spark. And so much more.

Is something missing? There is or it wont be complicated ;) But it anyway will be complicated.

Hope I find the missing piece of the jigsaw puzzle soon!

Return on Investment

Hats off to Prof. Eshwar who could relate any MBA funda to life and tried to teach us the same in the operations management classes. I found my analogy for operations management in life from one of the financial world's most important formula.

Its impossible to rationalise feelings and quantify relationship value. However I do feel the ROI (Return on Investment) can really give us a fair unbiased qualitative analysis.

ROI ∝ E1 x E2 x E3

E1 = Emotion; E2 = Esteem; E3 = Energy

It takes time to break even, however in the long run, the ROI should rather be positive. If any one of the E'd take a beating and goes negative, ROI will go down and then its not a project worth investing into. Time ofcourse is irrelevant here.

Some Hypothesis that is! But true if you spare a thought and analyse it.

Food for thought, aint it?

Spaces, Marriages and Wishes

Its the wedding season, and seems like everyone around me is getting married. And if there is one gift that I would like to give them all - is this beautiful quote. Its from 'The Prophet' - by Khalil Gibran.

Here it goes -

Then Almitra spoke again and said, "And what of Marriage, master?"
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

Wishing all of you a blissful married life. To You Sumukh, Shweta, Divya, Shruti, Archit and the already married folks!!

Best Wishes!

The "One"

Cant sleep tonight. Somedays they say - are just made for thinking. Welcome to today.I dont know whether it comes from being a Cancer - but dark skies make me wonder.I think like most water signs - that is from the heart.

Life can be pretty darn tough sometimes. Some say its simpler than simple. Everyday I walk into the unknown - with some set notions about what I know - rather what I think I know. Everyday doesnt get over. But I still question one thing. Everyday!!

How does one know?? How does one know that 'he' is the 'ONE'? what if you don't end up marrying the 'ONE', instead you end up marrying the other one. Then is the other one the 'ONE'?

Someday somebody's gonna ask you
A question that you should say yes to
once in your life
- Rhett Miller

And I need to know if he's the "ONE" to say yes. I wish it was as simple as making up an equation with all variables and ending up with x = HIM. How do you know when you have found the right person with whom to share the rest of your life? Will some bells ring? or some kind of akaashvani?

Probably there is a way. And thats tough to follow. One needs to be honest about the feelings, it is impossible to just “know” whether someone may be the right one for you. One needs to trust the gut feeling and intuition. Our intuition only strengthens and develops and echoes time and again when we make decisions and become more sensitive to our feelings. Sometimes, it takes the right timing to just know.

I read somewhere, Once in your life, if you are lucky you will meet a person who will divide life between the time before and after!

who, what, when, where, how....are questions time will answer. Till then im hoping he's just round the corner and i'l KNOW that its him and i can shout out to him, Hey You, Its YOU!!!

And hopefully its love and laughter happily ever after :)

Drop it and Carry on

Just tonight I was talking to my close friends who are now married to each other. They were not a happily wedded couple who is into the third month of their marriage. After listening to both sides, I could easily figure out what was wrong, but they did not seem to realize what it was. I could sense it.

"Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present" is one of the 45 life's lessons from Regina Bretts. Read them here. This one has got me thinking. Making our peace with things that have happened in the past whether your fault or not is of utmost importance or we keep spoiling the present.

We are a result of what has happened to us and what we choose or do not choose to do in life. Our comedy of errors shapes our life. You can never really cut that part out coz its still part of you. The most we can do is close the book and place it in the shelf where you cant see it. If we dont, it will just rise from ashes like the phoenix and meddles into the present. Keep the surroundings de-cluttered and you wont have a feeling of being lost. There is absolutely no space for past in the present. If the wheel of time has moved, give time to time. Move on and let bygones be bygones.

Getting past the past is what is needed at times. Do not carry extra baggage wherever you go like an overstuffed VIP suitcase. Do not be overburdened by something you do not need or isnt useful. Do not be tied down to something that makes the walk of life difficult. Untie those shoes and leave them behind. And Keep Walking.

Forgive and Forget. Travel light. Enjoy the journey called life.

Love Aaj Kal & Humesha

Note: This post is dedicated to two of the P's in my life. Both of them are males. They always go looking for logic and rationale behind everything. So here are my two cents for both of you and the other similar people on planet earth.

Go watch love aajkal and it should make some place in your head for faith in the fact that somethings including love defy logic. The movie re-affirmed mine. The main protagonists Meera and Jai,part of the 21st century 'Mango people' - the aam janta, learnt it the hard way.

Logic doesnt make all things work. Not all things have a law from physics behind it. Not all things come with rule books and instruction manuals. There are no global standards and processes to be followed. There is no right or wrong thing in love.

Be it the 16th century Romeo and Juliet or the 21st century Meera and Jai, the common denominator is love and that has no logical reasons. The only reasons are reasons only the heart knows. And it will always be that way.

So what makes things like love work is a secret ingredient. And the secret of the secret ingredient is NOTHING, but love.

Love,
Faded Glory

Of Arranged Marriages

Wanted , Fair(Read White), Slim, Beautiful, Homely, Convent Educated girl for Tall, Handsome, Educated, High Salary, High Status Family Boy.

Those are the keywords in any matrimonial advertisement. No matter how the guy looks, what he does, or how much he earns, the girl should have the above traits. Actually according to most indian sentimentalities, there are no ugly ducklings, fat, spoilt males. Irrespective of everything, they always are eligible bachelors.

I thought, probably times have changed and things are not the same. Until i came accross a WTF piece of news. Read for yourself - Want a celebrity lookalike as a partner. Seriously, WTF!!!

I was in for a shock, this is what matrimonial portals promote - Obsession with looks. But, then thats just what some men and the mothers of the men want.
I thought internet matrimonial portals are used mostly by the tech savvy,educated, liberated youth of India who think beyond the looks. One may wear Gucci boots, drive snazzy cars, listen to Bryan Adams and Mettalica, but on the inside not much of an evolution is there. But then what else can one expect, when even our Indian Gods are so obsessed with complexion. If not, Why else would Lord Krishna sing, 'Radha kyun gori mein kyun kaala??'. And, probably India is the only country with a market for creams like Fair and Lovely and the likes.

Here's a funny converation between a friend at work and a prospective groom.

***Some conversation before this***
Boy: Im 5 ft 6 inches tall and you are 5ft 5 1/2 inches tall. Is that okay with you?
Girl: No, actually i would prefer a slightly taller guy, so i guess we cant proceed. Sorry!
Boy: (With a heavy heart) Hmmm, but i guess it doesnt matter.
Girl: To me, it does. So, i guess. Thats about it. Good luck for your search.

(Background music - Dil ke armaan aansuoon mein beh gaye!! )
(The Boy still has something to say even after this)

Boy: Accha, I just wanted to tell you i have a jewellery shop in Karol Bagh, so when you shop for your wedding, you can walk into my shop. Will offer discounts.
Girl: (Speechlessly) Sure!! Bye
***End of Conversation***

I was in splits on hearing this!!! Classic Example of Product Bundling that i studied in marketing - Selling himself and the jewellery of his shop. Bussiness Promotion through a matrimonial portal. Cutting Edge! Indian minds arent that bad after all, we are an intelligent, innovative, jugaadoo lot.

We Indians are like that only - a little bit of this and that. Thats what makes us uniquely outrageous in a nice way. Incredible India!!

An ode to my friends

After air, water, food and family, my fifth lifeline has been friends. Friends who stood by me through thick and thin. Some new, some very old. Some i havent met for years and not spoken to over weeks, but still the connection is strong. I have to be really lucky to have such wonderful people around me, who dont judge but simply love.

When iv found myself in doldrums, the hands that pulled me out came easily. Support was a phonecall away. I cant imagine life without them. On days when you know somethings bothering you - friends give that listening ear without looking at the watch, how much time has gone by speaking. The feeling of security and optimism friends provide makes the panic attack I have subside. I can avoid meeting them, fight with them, irritate them, annoy them, not return phonecalls, not reply to sms's, howl and growl and crib to them, but i know they will still be there.

So here's to all you my gems -

You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed
You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach
You stood by me and I stood tall
I know this much is true
I was blessed because I was friends with you

(A lil tweaked version of a song)

The Seven Year Itch

Most people talk about the seven year itch. It may be seven months or four years into your relationship, before it starts itching. The emphasis is on the itch not the time when it occurs. So what do you do when it itches, start scratching rite??

When a relationship begins, partners cant get enough of each other, see no faults in others. As time goes by, ennui sets in. One starts criticizing the other for the flaws in the individual that were there all along. People are taken for granted. The novelty and charm of the new relationship is gone. The candle lit dinners, long walks, anniversary celebrations become a thing of the past. The monotony of life takes over. With little enthusiam in the air, dis-satisfaction with the current state of affairs sets in. Its like chewing gum, thats old and has lost its flavor and color and there's lil fun in chewing it.

I wonder, is the flame eternal or it needs to be re-fuelled to keep it burning. Im sure, sooner or later boredom would set in sooner or later, with anyone you have a relationship with. Contentment and Happiness is someting internal posted in a previous post - Completeness.

So what do you do other than scratching when it starts to itch? Breakoff with the old & Start of with some one more promising
OR
Indulge in an side-relationship (extramarital or two-timing) to get the thrill and excitement back into your life
OR
Re-invent yourself and the Relationship.

Its a story of - Different strokes for different folks. Any thoughts??

The Kite Runner

The book was recommended by a friend, and after sitting on the shelf for a few weeks, i finally laid my hands on the copy of the book i bought at a traffic signal. Its such a fabulous read.

The story is of a shia servant of a affluent Sunni Family in Afganistan in the early 80's. It is a heart warming story of two boys - Hassan and Amir and their relationship and their emotional challenges. The story weaves a medley of emotions - pain, pleasure, betrayal, loyalty, redemption, love, conceit, honesty, guilt - with such intensity and sensitivity - it makes you cry at numerous instances. So much so, the storyteller manages to strike just the right chords of the heart and leaves you speechless. It stirs your conscience and shakes you like the after tremors of an earthquake. It makes you totally involved in the characters and their journey. The climax, just as beautiful and satisfying like a fairytale. Go Read it!

Book: The KiteRunner
Author: Khaled Hosseni
Price: Rs 50 from the roadside vendor.
Tagline: There is a way to be good again.
Reading Experience: Priceless!
Warning: The KiteRunner may run you down.
My Fave line from the book: For you, a thousand times over...

Wedding Bells and more

The Navratras are going on, not that im very religious or something, but its supposed to augur well for people. And so, it seems to be having its effect. S just broke the news to me that she is getting married on 19th November of this year, then it was P's call that made me real happy. P is 2 weeks pregnant. :)

On the other hand, F is already managing a handful of kids, A and M will be soon trying to have a baby. Another friend S is expecting her baby in December and B is busy shopping for his wedding in December.

Just feels a little odd at times being single when most of your friend circle and peers are settling into life, starting a family or getting married. Chit-chatting about movies, food, shopping, clothes, girls, guys is passe. These things dont interest them anymore. Its given way to more serious conversations about life - expenses, bills, grocery, husbands, wives, babies, responsibility. And to these topics I have little to contribute to these talks from my end. Ggrrrrrr!! Puts me in a tight spot. I find myself doing the trapeze act of walking a tight rope, talking about a place im not there yet and a spot my friends have left behind.

Although the number of relationships with people is increasing in the process of friends getting married and having kids, the circle of friends is shrinking - they getting busy with their own new found lives. Not just friends even cousins my age are getting married. Im not getting any younger by the day, and i feel the time to settle down with life is nearing. Soon,il be moving out of the mid-20's clan.

A little voice in my head says - Bide your time and stand in line to wait for your turn, sweetie! All in due time!