What to do?

Situation:
I did something that is not right and shouldnt have done. However, by doing that wrong thing, i got to know of something that is really shocking, revealing and matters a lot to me and is totally unacceptable by me or for that matter ANY girl.

What should I do?
Stay mum coz i did something wrong too and keep the anger and hurt within myself. I was let down.
OR
Confront what I got to know. But my means of knowing it were wrong. Two wrongs never make a right.

Arrrgggghhhh!! Its killing me :(

Hole in my soul

Things happen. You fall. You get burnt. You get hurt. You cry. You get up. You smile. You move on. Time flies. BUT YOU DONT FORGET. Something still remains that reminds you of things. I dont forget. But it doesnt mean I want to remember it. And if I forget, what else is there to remember.

I find myself agreeing to Friedrich Nietzsche saying - "Blessed are the forgetful: for they get the better even of their blunders."

Wish we could select and delete certain things from our memories. But that would mean we would have a clean slate and go back to the start. Deleting the evidence also doesnt help. Even if you walk out of the door, bolt it and throw the key away so that you dont see what you left behind, because out of sight is out of mind?? Not really! It doesnt work. Forget and Forgive does not work for me either. Got too sharp a memory for me to forget ;)

I just hate something like that occupying any space in my mind. I so desperately want to forget certain things and erase them forever from my life and memories. How do I do it?

“There's a Hole In My Soul, That's been killing me forever.
It's a place where a garden never grows”. - Aerosmith

My 100th Post

My blog 'Faded Glory' is into the 3rd year and its my 100th post. Faded Glory has been my alter ego, my best friend at times, which i clinged to when I wanted to talk about my innermost feelings and some endless senseless talk.

The blog has also given me loyal followers and critics. Thanks to all of you in contributing to keep the charm of faded glory alive.

Cheers! Long Live Faded Glory!!

Way to go!

My cousin Aru, who is in KG has been caught with speaking english because she sees her siblings do that. At the age of 5 she tries her best to construct sentences.

Today during lunch we were discussing Ramayan for my other cousin's upcoming hindi test, Aru shouted in middle of the conversation - Sita ji earth se nikli thi and pot mein gayi. And all of us burst out laughing - Ki kya bol rahi hai. Only on second thought we figured out she meant a ghada when she said pot.

Later in the day, while we were leaving it started raining. And she again remarked - The baarish is shuru. More laughter.

Buoy!! Kids can be so cute and confident and foolish and smart - all at the same time.

And they do not think before speaking that they can be wrong. Wish we can be like that.

Chicken and the Egg

I am happy because things go my way OR things go my way because I am happy.

I get stressed when things dont go my way or things dont go my way because I am stressed.

Clueless!!

Common Onsite Disease

COD (trademark term by me) seems to affect almost everyone when they leave home to go onsite for a few weeks to a few months or maybe years. The COD (Common Onsite Disease) infects you the minute you step on foreign land.

For the first few days - the disease is asymptomatic. The subject shows no signs of malady and is happy go lucky. Only talks about how good the place is, how luxurious the hotel is, guys would definitely comment - Yahan ki bandiyan badi hot hai yaar!, girls definitely are elated at the shopping opportunities.

After the incubation period of a few days, the COD virus comes into activity. Here's a guide to know if the subject is suffering from common onsite disease. Symptoms include:

- More Hindi Usage
- 24X7 online status on IM's
- Too much internet presence
- Sudden fondness for Hindi Songs/Movies
- Calling friends back home more often than usual
- Feeling blue frequently

To be or not to be

Should you be yourself all the time without the fear of people getting judgemental or Should you portray a certain image and behave in a certain way?

Was shakespeare right in saying - All the world's a stage and we are actors who are supposed to act out or was he right when he said - God has given you one face, and you make yourself another??